Wellbeing A-Z

Abuse and safety

Child abuse and neglect is when a child is physically, emotionally or sexually harmed. It is also when the health, safety or wellbeing needs of a child are neglected. Child abuse can happen in families of any income, culture or religion. It often happens over a long period of time. The effects of abuse and neglect are serious and can last a lifetime.

There are different forms of child abuse. These include neglect, sexual, physical and emotional abuse:

• Neglect is the continued failure by a parent or caregiver to provide a child with the basic things needed for his or her proper growth and development, such as food, clothing, shelter, medical and dental care and adequate supervision.
• Sexual abuse is when someone involves a child or young person in a sexual activity by using their power over them or taking advantage of their trust.
• Physical abuse is a non-accidental injury or pattern of injuries to a child or young person caused by a parent, caregiver or any other person.
• Emotional abuse or psychological harm: serious psychological harm can occur where the behaviour of their parent or caregiver damages the confidence and self esteem of the child or young person, resulting in serious emotional disturbance or psychological trauma.

Resources

• Communities and Justice| My situation is...
• Support someone experiencing domestic and family violence (PDF 422KB)

Anxiety

We can all experience anxious feelings sometimes – it might be about exam results, a job interview or even who will win the final of a sports match. These feelings are a normal part of life and can help us avoid danger or perform at our best. For some people though, their anxious feelings can be much more extreme. This anxiety is more than feeling stressed – it's a serious condition that makes day-to-day life difficult.

Anxiety is the body’s physical response to fear. The symptoms might include:

• racing heart
• rapid breathing
• sweaty palms
• butterflies in your stomach
• ‘burst’ of energy.

The Black Dog Institute has more resources on anxiety.

Body image and self esteem

It is common for young people to feel increasingly uncomfortable with their bodies as changes occur during adolescence. Low self-esteem occurs when expectations of how you want your body to look don’t match up to reality. These types of feelings can lead to distorted thoughts and emotions about your bodies.

The four aspects of body image:

• how you see your body is your perceptual body image. This is not always a correct representation of how you actually look. For example, a person may perceive themselves as overweight when they are actually underweight.
• the way you feel about your body is your affective body image. This relates to the amount of satisfaction or dissatisfaction you feel about your shape, weight and individual body parts.
• the way you think about your body is your cognitive body image. This can lead to preoccupation with body shape and weight. For example, some people believe they will feel better about themselves if they are thinner or more muscular.
• behaviours in which you engage as a result of your body image encompass your behavioural body image. When a person is dissatisfied with the way they look, they may isolate themselves because they feel bad about their appearance or employ destructive behaviours (such as excessive exercising or disordered eating) as a means to change appearance.

Resources

• Reach out | Body Image
• Reach out | How to help a friend with an eating disorder
• Headspace | I'm supporting a young person

Bullying

Bullying is behaviour that is meant to be hurtful, targets a person or group of people, happens more than once and embarrasses, threatens or intimidates the person being bullied.

It may happen in person but can also happen out of sight or online. Bullies don’t always work alone. The impact of bullying can be even greater when a group of people begins to act together. Cyberbullying happens at least every few weeks to about one in 10 young people, and workplace bullying is also a common experience reported by young people.

The experience of being bullied is different for everyone. People may feel alone, anxious, scared, miserable and powerless, while others may feel overwhelmed by sadness, ashamed or rejected. They may feel there is no escape from the bully or that there is no hope that things will change. Anger is another common reaction, as the attack from the bully is unfair and unwarranted.

Find out more information on bullying (PDF 335.67KB)

Anti-bullying

Bullying of any kind is not acceptable in NSW schools.

The NSW anti-bullying website brings together information and resources for teachers, students, parents and carers. It helps to identify, prevent and respond effectively to student bullying, including online bullying. It provides information about online safety and what you can do if your child has been bullied, witnessed bullying or been involved in bullying.

Download or view our anti-bullying plan: Riverside Girls High School Anti-Bullying Plan (PDF 1.08 MB)

For more information on anti-bullying strategies for NSW public schools refer to the department’s Bullying of Students – Prevention and Response Policy.

For information on racial bullying and anti-racism education for NSW public schools refer to:

• Anti-Racism Policy
• Anti-racism education
• Racism. No way.

Cybersafety

Cyberbullying is the use of technology to harass, threaten, embarrass, or target another person. If you have been the target of cyberbullying including, online threats, mean or, aggressive texts, tweets or the posting of personal information and/or pictures, follow the steps.

1. Resist the urge to respond
2. Screenshot evidence
3. Report and Block
4. Talk to Someone you can trust.
5. Report It To eSafety

For further details on how to deal with cyberbullying go to the eSafety website https://www.esafety.gov.au/young-people/cyberbullying.

Depression

For some young people, feelings of sadness and unhappiness outweigh their happy and excited emotions.

When you have depression, these sad feelings become overwhelming and long-lasting, affecting how you think, how you feel and what you do. These feelings can last for weeks, months or even longer.

Emotional symptoms of depression include:

• feeling sad, down or empty for most of the day, nearly every day
• loss of interest or pleasure in normal activities
• becoming withdrawn from friends or family
• feelings of worthlessness or guilt
• suicidal thoughts
• crying for no reason.

Physical symptoms of depression include:

• low energy, fatigue and reduced activity
• insomnia or difficulty sleeping
• loss of appetite or weight
• increased sleep or appetite (atypical depression)
• trouble concentrating, making decisions and remembering things
• slowed body movements, thinking or speech
• difficulty sitting still, pacing or hand-wringing
• diminished sex drive
• back pain or headaches
• feeling sick and run down
• digestive problems.

Symptoms of anxiety are also common in people with depression, as the 2 conditions often occur together.

You can find more information on depression in young people (PDF 208.7KB)

Domestic violence

Domestic violence is pattern of behaviour through which a person seeks to dominate and control another person. Domestic and family violence usually occurs when someone in an intimate or familial relationship tries to assert control or power over another. It can be psychological, social, physical, sexual, verbal, technology and financial abuse, stalking, property damage and reproductive control. It is usually women who are the victims of domestic violence although some men can also be victims.  Domestic violence is often not recognised by others and it occurs across in communities and across all cultures.

Being abused is NOT normal.

Psychological: Put downs, name calling and intimidation, undermining self-esteem, sulking and threats to commit suicide.

Verbal: Saying things to scare a person/s, name calling, threats and intimidation.

Sexual: Forcing sexual activity. Unwanted sexual activity, forcing a partner to do things they don’t want to do sexually, rape, humiliation of a sexual nature.

Social: Controlling friends and people you meet/see, what you wear and what you do. Preventing the person from leaving the house or going to their place of worship. Preventing them contacting family of friends, monitoring you mobile phone. Refusing to do any housework or child care. Making the person feel guilty about work relationships or friends or going to work. Checking up on whereabouts of person. Making all the decisions.

Physical: Threats and actual harm causing injuries including bruising, punching, hitting, breaking bones, pushing, choking, threaten with a weapon. Threaten or actual physical abuse to children as above or pregnant woman, denying sleep or warmth or food. Denying medical care. Driving in a dangerous or threatening manner with other family in the car.

Financial: Withholding and controlling the finances, denies access to money or makes the person ask for money for basic items such as food. Not allowing the person to apply for a job or making it difficult. Controlling credit cards or access to bank accounts.

Technology: using technology to abuse, threaten or humiliate, controlling access to technology and monitoring things like mobile phones. Denying access to mobile phone.

Reproductive Control: not allowing use of a contraceptive or controlling type of contraceptive. Controlling timing and number of children, forcing decisions about termination of pregnancy.

Property Damage: Punching holes in the wall, damaging the car, abusing the family pet, taking away things that are important.

Stalking: following the family member, spying on them, repeated phone calls and texts, harming pets, loitering around the workplace or where the person is going, sending unwanted deliveries, sending chocolates or flowers, damaging property or moving belonging around, changing details on personal information.

Drugs and alcohol

Drugs and alcohol change the balance of chemicals that help your brain to think, feel, create and make decisions. The drugs and alcohol you use can affect you both now and in the future. Changing drug and alcohol habits can take time, but with support and perseverance you will notice positive changes in your mental and physical wellbeing.

Signs and symptoms of substance abuse or addiction

• regularly or continued substance use to cope emotionally, socially or physically
• neglecting responsibilities and activities that are important or enjoy (such as work, study, family, hobbies, sports, social commitments)
• participating in dangerous or risky behaviours as a result of substance use (for example drink driving, unprotected sex, using dirty needles)
• relationship problems (such as arguments with partner, family, friends, or losing friends)
• physical tolerance – needing more of the substance to experience the same effects
• withdrawal – physical and mental withdrawal symptoms when you are not using the substance or needing the substance to feel “normal”
• losing control of your substance use – being dependent or unable to stop even if you want or try to
• substance use takes over your life (like spending a lot of time using, finding or getting the substance and recovering from the effects)

More information on drugs and alcohol is available via ReachOut.

Grief and loss

Feelings of loss and grief can be really strong when you lose something or someone. You might experience a range of emotions and wonder if the pain of your loss will ever fade. No one can tell you how to feel or how to grieve but it can help to talk about it and get support from the people who care about you.

The intensity of our grief, how long it lasts, and our reactions to it will differ from person to person. Some common reactions include:

• feeling sad or down
• frequent crying
• shock, denial, numbness
• stress, anxiety, confusion, exhaustion
• anger, guilt, shame, blame or even relief
• loneliness, isolation and withdrawal
• feeling or acting differently to usual
• physical health problems – headaches, changes in eating or sleeping patterns
• difficulty concentrating
• not enjoying usual activities and hobbies
• tension or problems with personal relationships
• increased alcohol, smoking or drug use
• feeling hopeless or like you can’t go on – thoughts of suicide or self-harm

For more information on getting help with feelings of grief and loss please refer to Lifeline.

Identity and gender

Feeling ‘different’ can be tough, especially when you’re a teenager going through lots of changes. The most important thing is to be true to yourself and surround yourself with supportive people.

Things to look out for in the young person struggling with gender and identity may also experience:

• changes in mood – feeling sadder, more anxious, or more irritable than usual
• changes in behaviour – being less talkative, becoming withdrawn or being more aggressive
• changes in relationships – falling out with friends or their partner, or conflict with family
• changes in appetite – eating more or less than usual, or losing or gaining weight rapidly
• changes in sleep patterns – not sleeping enough, or sleeping too much
• changes in coping – feeling overwhelmed or tired of life
• changes in thinking – more negative thoughts, or thoughts of self harm or suicide.

Find more information on identity and gender issues.

Relationships and friendships

All relationships and friendships go through difficult times and experiencing occasional problems and conflict in personal relationships is normal. However, sometimes these problems can become overwhelming.

When friendships don’t go smoothly it can be a really stressful time.

Some common friendship concerns for teenagers:

• changes in friendships or a friend’s behaviour
• moving away from old friends and having to meet new ones
• growing apart from friends and developing different interests
• new people joining friendship groups and changing the dynamic
• getting dumped by friends and not knowing why.

For support with relationships and friendships refer to ReachOut.

Self harm

Self-harm means any behaviour which involves the deliberate causing of pain or injury to oneself, usually as an extreme way of trying to cope with distressing or painful feelings. Self-harm includes cutting, burning or hitting oneself, binge-eating or starvation, or repeatedly putting oneself in dangerous situations. It can also involve abuse of drugs or alcohol, including overdosing on prescription medications.

Self-harm is relatively common. Research shows that about 1% of Australians have self-harmed within the last month and about 8% have self-harmed in their lifetime. Most people start self-harming as a teenager or young adult. It can continue for many years and become a habit that is difficult to stop.

Examples of self-harm may include:

• cutting the skin with sharp objects
• taking an overdose of medication or drinking poison
• burning the skin
• hitting the body with fists or another object
• punching walls or other objects
• scratching or picking the skin, resulting in bleeding or welts
• pulling out hairs.

Refer to headspace for further information.

Stress

Experiencing stress is part of being alive. A small amount of stress, such meeting a challenge or deadline can actually be helpful. It can lead to increased alertness, energy and productivity. A complete lack of stress can lead to reduced motivation and performance.

Stress triggers off the 'fight or flight' response, preparing the body to take action against potential danger. Hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol are released, causing the heart rate, metabolism and breathing rate to speed up.

Body

The symptoms of stress and changes with your body that you may notice include:

• headaches
• other aches and pains
• sleep disturbance
• fatigue
• upset stomach, diarrhoea
• high blood pressure
• weakened immune system
• muscle tension
• change in sex drive (male or female).

Mind

The symptoms of stress affecting your mind, thoughts and feelings include:

• anxiety, worry
• anger, irritability
• depression
• feeling overwhelmed and out of control
• feeling moody, tearful
• difficulty concentrating
• low self-esteem, lack of confidence
• behaviour.

The symptoms of stress that impact your behaviour include:

• overeating or undereating
• outbursts
• relationship problems
• alcohol, smoking or drug abuse
• avoiding people.

Here are some tips to help reduce stress and prepare for exams.

Suicide

Feelings of despair and hopelessness are common in a young person with anxiety and depression. If you do feel isolated and alone and have thoughts of suicide, then you need to let someone know that you need help.

If you, or someone you care about, is in crisis and you think immediate action is needed, call emergency services (triple zero or 000), contact your doctor or mental health crisis service, or go to your local hospital emergency department. Do not leave the person alone, unless you are concerned for your own safety.

There are a number of warning signs that a person might be thinking about suicide. Some of these include:

• discussions surrounding suicide, even if it seems to be a joke
• being moody, withdrawn or sad (note that a sudden positive mood can also be a bad sign as it may mean a person has made up their mind to suicide)
• losing interest in things they previously enjoyed
• taking less care of their appearance
• anxiety or agitation, including difficulty concentrating or sleeping
• engaging in self-destructive or risky behaviour
• increased use of alcohol or drugs
• previous suicide attempts
• giving possessions away and saying goodbye
• gaining access to a means of ending their life.

Here are three steps to help prevent suicide.